


Same Soul Sadness

by WishMoon (A_Wish_On_the_Moon)



Series: SofA Lite Exchange 2020 Gifts [2]
Category: Kingdom Hearts (Video Games)
Genre: Angst, Bittersweet Ending, F/M, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Multi, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Possibly Unrequited Love, Romantic Friendship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-01
Updated: 2021-01-01
Packaged: 2021-03-11 03:08:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,732
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28078224
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/A_Wish_On_the_Moon/pseuds/WishMoon
Summary: Sora wishes, Roxas forgives, and Xion regrets. In the end, who does Roxas see, when he looks into your eyes? Sora, or… Xion?(She was neverjusta puppet.)((And you? You were neverjusta boy.))
Relationships: Kairi/Sora (Kingdom Hearts), Naminé/Riku (Kingdom Hearts), Riku/Sora (Kingdom Hearts), Roxas/Sora (Kingdom Hearts), Roxas/Xion (Kingdom Hearts)
Series: SofA Lite Exchange 2020 Gifts [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2085768
Kudos: 13
Collections: SofA Lite





	Same Soul Sadness

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Taruchinator](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Taruchinator/gifts).
  * In response to a prompt by [Taruchinator](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Taruchinator/pseuds/Taruchinator) in the [sofa2020lite](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/sofa2020lite) collection. 



> **Prompt:**  
>  I'm fine with any length of fic or even artwork too! 
> 
> Ships can also be either in an AU setting or canon/post-canon, but they aren't necessary either. I'd be more than happy with something centered around the characters too~

⭑⁕⭑

People come, and people go, but, when it comes to you, people never quite leave when they do. The threads of fate that connect them wrap around your heart like silvered wings, and leave behind a warmth that should bring a smile to your face.

(should, could, _would_ , but that’s a lot of if’s, isn’t it?)

It’s too painful to think that, that nothing lasts forever. Nothing lasts forever, except when it does, because the bonds you make are bonds worth making, and there’s nothing you wouldn’t do to keep them.

To keep them, to accept them, to _live_ them, because they are worth more than their weight in gold, in riches, in dreams. You can’t ever imagine letting them disappear, let alone fade away.

(These people _matter_ , your friends _matter_.)

((… Your bonds are worth more than the [ f a m i l y ] you left behind.))

⭑⁕⭑

“[ Y o u r ] Kindness is [ y o u r ] Strength.” 

[ H e r ] words trails softly, melancholy, into the twilight, as tears fall like sea-salt ocean spray onto the body of a [ g i r l ] [ h e ] doesn’t hate, [ h e ] could _never_ hate, as [ h e ] wishes, desperately, for [ h e r ] to _live_.

“Why… _Xion_?”

(The glimmer of crystal oceans beneath dark waves, drowning.)

“I think you’ll like him,” [ s h e ] whispers with her ragged breath, bringing a hand to rest on [ h i s ] jaw. 

Ice blossoms over [ h i s ] skin at her touch, but all [ h e ] can hear [ h i m ]self beg is, “ _Who_?”

.

.

.

<< “ _S O R A._ ” >>

.

.

.

When [ X I O N ] scatters into a thousand crystal shards, [ s h e ] takes with her everything that made [ R O X A S ] love, and left behind everything that made [ h i m ] want to... destroy.

(It’s not fair, [ h e ] thinks, as shadows trickle into the darkness. It’s not fair, [ h e ] hisses, as the remnants of souls sluice into the moon-stricken sea. It’s not _fair_ , [ h e ] wails, as [ h e ] cuts deep, and dangerous, into everything else, because the cavern within [ h i m ] is empty, and hollow, and [ h e ] is _hungry_ for retribution.)

Atop the bodies of a thousand twisted Nobodies, [ S O R A ]’s name burns an endless void into the back of [ h i s ] skull, but all [ R O X A S ] can picture is [ _h e r_ ] crystal eyes and sea salt tears.

.

Sora, Sora, _Sora_ . It’s always about freaking _Sora_.

… Roxas hates the very idea of him.

.

.

(What’s so great about him, anyhow?)

.

.

<< “For what it’s worth, I’m sorry.” >>

.

.

⭑⁕⭑

_And, then, the Darkness consumes._

⭑⁕⭑

.

.

<< “Nice job, _hero_. Let’s try this again.” >>

.

.

When Sora sleeps, Sora _dreams_. 

Dreams, Naminé sees, of little girls with blood-red fire in their hair and oceans in their eyes. Of streaks of silver within a boy rotting in the miasma of his own envy and darkness. 

Of mages, and advisors, and the shadows they slew. 

Of a king without a throne, and a kingdom, _consumed_.

<<That light-cursed destiny that ties him to the fate of _millions_.>>

… Of a nobody, and a wish, and the cracks in [ h i s ] soul forged from a [ h e a r t ] it should not have ever had, to begin with. 

⭑⁕⭑

(She never sees [ h e r ] self, in these dreams.)

((Then, again, Naminé thinks, [ s h e ] was never part of the picture, anyhow.))

⭑⁕⭑

A witch cannot be loved, for all that she may wish it. A soldier cannot drown, for all that [ h e ] waits for the end. But, between them both, they raise up a warrior cast in the light of a thousand lives, a thousand _hearts_ , still beating, and tuck away their own insecurities and misgivings to ensure he awakes.

Everything is for his sake, Riku insists. Naminé smiles bittersweet regret into the spaces between them, because [ h e ] isn’t wrong. Haunted eyes connect with ones blinded by sorrow, but distance divides them like an old, familiar ache, as they bathe in the absence of a sky still sleeping.

⭑⁕⭑

( _Of course it’s for his sake_ , she paints onto the canvas of [ h i s ] mind. _It always has been_.)

⭑⁕⭑

A drop in the ocean, as magic swirls to the fore. A hope that <<ripples>>, ever outwards, as the — P I E C E S — of… ( ( y-o-u-r ) )… soul… [ r e c o n n e c t ].

There is a song in [ y o u r ] heart, and an (O A T H) wrapped around [ y o u r ] wrist. A whisper, a plea, that echoes in [ y o u r ] ears. 

Who is it, that sounds so sad? Who is it, that [ y o u ] need to help?.

⭑⁕⭑

.

(Wake up… [ S O R A ].)

.

⭑⁕⭑

The illusions that taint the halls of Castle Oblivion nip at the last vestiges of [ h i s ] weaknesses, merge his heart _whole_ , but... in spite of everything, [ R I K U ] cannot rest.

“He’ll ask for you, you know,” Naminé hums, as she twines her icy fingers in-between the gaps of [ h i s ] own. “I’ve seen how far he will go, how far he has _gone_ , for the sake of those he believes in.”

The shallow light of a moon at midnight. Clenched teeth, as fingers tremble. Goosebumps, peppered on flesh. A grimace twists [ R I K U ]’s face as [ h e ] turns away, because [ h e ] cannot go back to the way things once were. 

“I can’t face him, yet. Not like this, not _now_.”

She smiles sadly in reply, huffing out a stilted breath, before bringing her arms up to cradle his weary head and hold him close. For all that [ h e ] is not the replica, and the replica was (not) [ h i m ], this boy is not so different, is he?

 _You are as restless as you are loyal_ , Naminé (doesn’t) whisper into the shell of his ear. _As loyal as you are angry. At yourself, at the world, but… Sora doesn’t care for any of that._

(You know this, so why? Why seek out forgiveness… _when you are already forgiven_?)

⭑⁕⭑

When Sora rebirths from the world of his memories, he does not yet realize that the ghosts he’s kept chasing are far too long gone. He wakes to empty walls and empty rooms, and shines false sunlight as the things he’s forgotten rise with the tide and threaten to bring him under.

Wakes to an empty sort of fullness, where the things that have changed serve as distraction, enough, because for [ S O R A ]? He does not yet realize: the weight of sacrifices made… in his name.

Doesn’t, perhaps, or won’t, because, no matter what Riku did or what Naminé says, no matter what the Light insists, a nobody is not a nobody. 

(A nobody can never _be_ a nobody, not when the proof of their existence is branded into the very _hearts_ of those they once knew.)

⭑⁕⭑

.

(It’s not _fair_ , Sora screams, when placid smiles and bittersweet chuckles hit his ears.)

(( _It’s alright_ , Roxas insists; _I understand now_.))

.

.

<<In order for you to live, Sora hears over the roar in his ears, we had to... _disappear_.>>

.

⭑⁕⭑

Who do you see, she asks them, when you look at me?

 _What do you mean?_ Roxas mumbles past the sea-salt ice cream in his mouth, as Axel arches a brow.

Xion doesn’t answer. [ S O R A ] doesn’t expect (her) to.

⭑⁕⭑

A reflection of himself, cast in a reflection of another’s. A piece of his soul, except that soul does not belong to [ h i m ], anymore. The will to change, the desire to exist… the things [ s h e ] was never given, even though they should have belonged to [ h e r ].

The First of a dream, the Fourteenth of an Organization. The one, and only, who [ R - X - S ] sees, shattering into crystal sea and salty sky, who gave [ h i m ] an oath, and oblivion, in equal measure.

… Sora wishes he could have met her.

.

Ebony hair, ocean-sky eyes. Skin as fair as seashells on the shore.

_Who do you see?_

Chocolate locks, sky-ocean orbs. A tan darker than the sands of home.

.

( _You’re not Sora_ , he wants to insist. _You’re not a puppet!_ )

((You’re… _Xion_.))

.

A shard, and a dream, and a wish.

_A somebody, or a nobody?_

A hope, and a light, and a heart.

.

.

(Are we really so different?)

.

.

“My name’s Sora,” he greets with a wide grin, seeking out the pieces of his heart that are not [ h i s ]. 

He wants to know them, wants to know who they are, who they’ve been. The stories, that make them as real as Riku, and Kairi, and Sora. As real as the somebodies they split from, as real as their own being. 

_Sora_ , like the sky. _Sora_ , like the (sea)shell. But, the boy in front of him doesn’t notice his words, let alone his greeting. Though he’s looking straight into his eyes, Sora can’t help feeling like he’s seeing someone that isn’t there.

⭑⁕⭑

_Who do you see?_ Sora should ask. Shared names, shared faces, shared windows to the soul. 

(Who is it, that makes you share that same-soul sadness that

burns in my chest, and...

takes my own breath away?)

Instead, he clenches his fists harder into the collar of a dark, shadowy cloak, and shuts his eyes in frustration. Brings himself closer to the empty void of another still hurting, still bleeding, even though he has no wounds for his tears to fall from.

.

_He doesn’t want to know. Can’t, Sora thinks, because the guilt is worse than the heartache._

.

“... Roxas, I guess,” the boy mumbles, the bittersweet quirk of a smile in his tone. He crushes Sora into an embrace that the both of them need. And, Sora, weak to the feelings that consume him, collapses into Roxas with a wordless cry, and (doesn’t) let himself feel safe with the chill-touch warmth of his padded gloves and aching arms.

They’re both still grasping at others’ backs, as they hold each other close. 

(Still looking, still hoping.)

_I’m sorry_ , Sora should say, but the specter of Xion haunts him as surely as Roxas’s (key)blade, and he’s not allowed to apologize for being the very thing they were sacrificed for.

_._

_._

_._

_Breathe, Sora. Please._

( _After all, there’s always a Tomorrow… isn’t there?_ )

.

.

.

**Author's Note:**

> In my defense, Xion's pseudo-death and the conflict Roxas has with the Somebody-Nobody situation is totally a great plot ground for a SoRoxas relationship! 
> 
> But, also, yeah, angst and unrequited (but not really) situations abound. Also, some Namiku and SoRiku for the soul, because I can! :D


End file.
